Family Mediation Lawyers.

As mediation is a voluntary and relatively informal process, there are few rules regarding who can attend.

Family Mediation can be an effective method of resolving disagreements for a wide range of people, for example:

• Couples going through separation – to resolve differences before they lead to more serious disagreements
• Separated couples with outstanding differences – to resolve long-standing, seemingly intractable issues
• Divorced couples – to resolve issues which fall outside the Final Order of Divorce (previously called a “Decree Absolute”)
• Married or unmarried parents – to resolve specific child arrangement issues

Other extended family members – to resolve wider family disagreements, such as ongoing grandparent contact

Mediation can be used at any stage, including after a relationship has ended. It can be an effective method of resolving disputes at any point, as it provides a more constructive, less hostile environment than the courts. Your mediator will seek to ensure that the focus of the process remains on reaching a mutually satisfactory agreement, rather than one party “winning”, and will support both sides to come together in an impartial way. This means that longstanding issues which have become difficult or impossible to discuss can be resolved.

The most common time to use mediation is during separation, at a point when negotiations are ongoing, but becoming difficult. It is better to get support with these discussions early, to avoid rising tension and either party becoming entrenched in their position. The success of the mediation process is now so widely recognised that the court may in fact refuse to hear your case or otherwise consider it as a factor when deciding on costs orders if you cannot show that you have at least attempted to resolve your issues through mediation first.

One of the benefits of mediation is that you are in control of the remit of the mediator. The informal nature of the process gives you flexibility when it comes to deciding what can be discussed, and, because it is voluntary, you can set limits on the issues which can be raised.

This means that the discussions which you have through your mediation process can be as focused or wide-ranging as you need. Often couples will use mediation to resolve the discrete elements of their separation which are causing issues, saving time and money by keeping the focus of dispute narrow.

The type of issues which can be resolved using mediation include:

• Childcare arrangements (living arrangements and the time that children will spend with parents and wider family members)
• Which school a child should attend
• Spousal maintenance
• Division of assets
• Arrangements for the sale of property
• Allocation of debts

Ongoing management of a family business

The principal benefit of mediation is the less formal, less confrontational environment it creates for you to resolve your differences. By maintaining focus on achieving a mutually agreeable solution, mediation can remove the sense of a party winning or losing, which can create resentment. The court process can be confrontational and sometimes hostile, with consequences for your ongoing relationship with your former partner/spouse. In addition the outcome imposed by a judge could be different to what either of the parties wanted! Often, although the relationship has ended, ongoing contact with your former partner/spouse is necessary, particularly if you have children together. Using mediation or the collaborative law process can help to ensure that discussions remain positive and collaborative.

Benefits to using mediation include:

• Emotionally easier – The less formal and hostile nature of mediation proceedings also means that it is less stressful than going to court and less likely to be upsetting, particularly for children.
• Cost-effective – The process is almost always significantly quicker and more cost-effective than court proceedings. You will need to pay fees to the mediator, as well as ongoing fees to your solicitor for their tandem legal advice, preparation and submission of the final agreement for judge approval. However these will be significantly less than the costs of going to court.
• Flexibility – the scheduling and scope of matters addressed is down to you and your former partner/spouse.

Control – you are in control of the process and can choose the mediator you want to work with, the time and location of the meetings, and the nature of the things you want to negotiate. This allows you to specifically target certain elements of your separation which are causing difficulties, further increasing the efficiency of the process.

A mediator will work with both parties to identify the source of any difficulties you are having in coming to an agreement and will then support you to resolve them. They will remain impartial and seek to find common ground between you and your former partner. The focus of the mediator will be to give information and guidance on the general process to enable you to reach a compromise, in tandem with your respective solicitors, which is agreeable to both parties.

Part of the role of the mediator is to ensure that you think carefully about your proposals and how practical they are. Any agreement needs to be sustainable, and your mediator will be trained to ensure that both the immediate and long-term consequences of the decisions you make are considered.

As stated above, it is not the job of a mediator to provide legal advice, so it is important that you have legal representation through the process, to ensure that your rights are fully protected. We have a huge amount of experience supporting people through the mediation process and helping them to secure the arrangements they want for their future.

Some mediators will also work directly with children to consider their position and ensure that their wishes and interests are taken into account.

The first step is to meet with a mediator for a Mediation Information Assessment Meeting (MIAM). At this meeting, the mediator will explain the details of the process, answer any questions you have, and go through your other options. Following this meeting, you can decide whether mediation is the right option in your circumstances. You are required to have a MIAM before you make an application to court.

The next stage is the mediation meetings themselves. You will attend these meetings with your former partner and the mediator. At these meetings, you will explore the issues you are facing and seek to resolve your differences. You are in control of how these meetings are run and what is discussed.

Once you have reached a mutually agreeable conclusion, the mediator will draw up a summary of the proposals you and your former partner have agreed to. Again, the format of this summary is within your control. Where decisions have been reached relating to children, a child only memorandum of understanding can be produced.

The agreements which you come to during mediation are not legally binding, but you can choose to turn them into a separation agreement or a consent order, which can be approved by a court. We can deal with the legal processes required to formalise your arrangements, if that is what you choose to do. We usually do recommend that matters agreed in mediation are converted into binding court orders, for finality and enforceability.

In circumstances where it would be too difficult to discuss your issues face-to-face, it is possible to hold what is called Shuttle Mediation, where the mediator acts as a link between you and your former partner/spouse, who can remain in separate rooms. The mediator will work with each attendee to understand their concerns, and then “shuttle” to the other room to explore whether a compromise can be reached between you.

If you would prefer a more formal, and legally binding, process, but still hope to avoid going to court, arbitration provides an alternative to mediation. In arbitration proceedings, you retain the control and flexibility of mediation, but a trained arbitrator will preside and will adjudicate. Unlike mediation, the third party makes a decision about the most appropriate way to resolve your differences, and that decision is legally binding.

Collaborative Law is another ADR method which is similar to Mediation in many aspects but sees your Collaborative lawyer participate in each meeting alongside you. That enables support and legal advice to be given during each meeting in a more fluid, transparent and immediate fashion than in the Mediation model.

More information on Family Arbitration and Collaborative Law is available. Contact our expert collaborative family law team today to discuss your options.